Ok, so this is assuming I have a boyfriend. But this is my idea of the best Valentines Day evening. First, I can’t help but think of the song by Fun., Light a Roman Candle With Me. That is one of my favorite songs, ever. The entire album doesn’t have one bad song, in fact. I highly recommend buying the album. They have only made the one album, unfortunately, but I’m still hopeful that there will be more. UPDATE: Since this post, they have come out with a new album: Some Nights.

Anyway, back to my perfect Valentines evening. I’d like it to be chill and something we both like to do, like the song says “Light a roman candle with me…spend an evening with me, just a lazy evening.”

This song, not necessarily the (500) Days of Summer that accompanies it, embodies the comfortable, relaxing evening that one would enjoy with their crush. Whether it be a crush of many years or a new flame. The level of comfort that this song depict is cozy and familiar along with being exciting and flirty.

I was talking with friends last night about the expectations around Valentines Day. They insisted that roses were a must. I disagreed. My reasoning stemmed from the fact that roses, or any bouquet, were not a thoughtful gesture. Men were expect to bring home flowers on that day. They argued that it was impossible to just ‘pick some up’ on the way home on that night and that, therefore, required planning ahead. I agreed that it took thinking ahead to come home with flowers, but that the flowers, in and of themselves, were still not a thoughtful gesture. I would much rather get a gift that reflects something that my partner would have had to notice about me to purchase what he did. Then the flowers would still be a sweet gesture but the thoughtful gift is what would endear him to me. With that thoughtful gift, I could honestly pass on the flowers. I would never even notice that they were missing. But if I was given just flowers, I may smile initially but it would be a very fleeting sense of appreciation. I still say that it takes very little thought to come up with flowers as a gift. It would mean much more to me if he picked up on something that I love and talked about often. Because, believe me, when people are a fan of something, they talk about it. The endearing part is when I realize that my partner listened to what I said and got an appropriate gift. The amount of money spent is irrelevant, to me, at least. I still stand by the thoughtful factor. Some of the most inexpensive things I’ve received have been the most special to me. Like a post card from a friend I had visited, that I received after I arrived back home. Or refrigerator magnets with silly social media phrases. Or a necklace and earring set that was made for me in red because I had been looking for a red set for a year. Those are things people talk about that make it easy to get them something you know they’ll like and use.

Also, the idea that an elaborate dinner is a must, is a little silly. Granted, there is a time for such things but make those dinners about celebrating something, not just doing it because you feel obligated to pick the nicest place since it’s VDay. I think it’s fun to cook together. Or just spend some low-key, one-on-one time with each other. That can be at a cozy bar or a restaurant or at home. I think that the best Valentines evening would be a result of us talking it over and deciding what we both wanted to do. We may find that we both just want to stay in. Or we could want to meet at our favorite place and have some apps. Deciding together would make it enjoyable for both parties, as well as take the pressure off.

What are your typical Valentines Day expectations? What are your plans for this year?